Living life while existential threat surrounds us
It's always been there, but now we hear about it more often. What can we do to manage this? More guidance, inspiration and a dash of fun inside
Like many people, I tuned in to the news only to hear about the stray missiles landing in Poland, killing two people. Immediately the baying began on social media…
NATO should respond with strength!
We cannot be weak in the face of such aggression!
It was hard not to be driven into paralysing anxiety while this was going on.
So what did I do?
I did what I had to do.
I turned the radio off and I put my phone down.
The existential threat wasn’t going anywhere. Yes, I was worried, but what could I do? I could try to keep some semblance of normality in our lives and my balm my shredded nerves by taking a warm bath of routine.
So, I packed the kids off to kindy and school. That took a while, and it was soothing to be immersed in the usual groove of life, however banal it may seem in the face of existential threat.
I came home to make coffee. I resolved to tune in for 5 minutes to find out the latest. I fired up Twitter (yes, I’m still there, but on Mastodon too). I checked The Guardian and the NY Times. And then I put my phone down and fired up Apple Fitness and did a 30 minute strength work out. My shoulders still hurt 36 hours later.
I went hard. I had some feelings to process. But I turned my nervous energy into a positive outcome, and refused to stoke my anxiety any further than necessary to get a cold, hard rational view of the situation.
Minimise your exposure to just the necessary.
Process your emotions. Give yourself space.
Experience and transform.
Stick to your care routine.
Set yourself a low bar. Good enough is just fine.
What else can we do?
“Take back control”
You no doubt heard this a lot during Brexit and since. And now the UK is seeking energy independence. The US wants its microchips to be 'made in America'. The Uk doesn’t want it’s microchips controlled by China. China is targeting self-sufficiency in food. India wants technological 'self-reliance'.
Is this a new age of autarky? Are we withdrawing from each other for good?What even is autarky?
Definition: Autarky is the characteristic of self-sufficiency, usually applied to societies, communities, states, and their economic systems.
Autarky originated in ancient Greek philosophy, where it was both an ideal and a practical political objective for states in a dangerous and untrustworthy world. And the autarky trap has persisted down the centuries ever since. Autarky has become a common goal for both left-leaning and right-leaning political groups, from communists to fascists, from imperial powers to anti-colonialist movements.
For this first episode of this three-part Radio 4 series, Ben Chu, economics reporter for BBC Newsnight, looks at the history of autarky and asks whether there is something in our nature that draws us towards autarky's promises of security, self-reliance, and independence.
Don’t teach pessimism
Some parents - out of a sense of trying to protect their children - assume incorrectly that teaching their children that the world is a bad place is best for them. In fact, 92% thought that seeing the world as safe to very safe will not prepare their children to navigate the world.
Model realistic optimism instead.
Realistic optimism means having realistic expectations for yourself and then striving to achieve them. Realistic optimists are aware of the challenges they face and know the road ahead isn't always smooth. But they know that something has to change and trust that success is possible.
Many parents revealed the belief that their children would benefit by being coached to see the world as declining, cutthroat, fragile, unfair, barren, not funny, and full of physical threats. The findings suggest otherwise.
People with more negative beliefs about the world were less healthy, suffered more frequent negative emotion states, were more likely depressed, were much less satisfied with their lives, and enjoyed substantially less psychological flourishing.
As the researchers concluded, parents might look at pausing any well-meaning efforts to instill such negative beliefs in their children. It’s not really helping.
…realistic optimism means trying to overcome cynicism and pessimism without being all Pollyanna-ish.
“It’s easy to feel like flotsam floating on the ocean, even as a small country it can feel like that at times, but we are active participants in the world, but we can ask ourselves what sorts of things we can change,” Johal says.
“In crisis and emergency management, we say ‘look for the helpers’. Don’t just stand around but look to help the helpers,” he says.
“How can we learn from this in our lives and assist rather than just letting bad things happen?” Me, quoted here.
Searching for the ultimate porridge
I admit it. I don’t make proper porridge anymore. I use the instant type just because trying to do everything in the morning with a pre-schooler, a new-entrant school kid, and an 11-year old and get everyone out of the house on time with the dog walked can be a bit of a time press. But I’m interested in better porridge again. Maybe like this?
Porridge, as Goldilocks can attest, is a deeply personal thing, so it can take a few goes to get it “just right”. For Jeremy Lee, chef-patron of Quo Vadis in London and author of Cooking: Simply and Well, for One or Many, the perfect bowl is a “soft, yielding, meltingly soothing brew” with a “soft, dropping consistency”, which he achieves with his mum’s recipe. Soak one cup of pinhead oats (“Not the big flakes: I don’t like those”) overnight in water, then gently heat them in three cups of water and simmer “quietly”, stirring all the while with a pinch of salt, until they’re cooked to your desired consistency.
So come on, spill your best porridge making rituals - and it doesn't just have to be plain oats.
If a paid membership is too much commitment for you right now, that’s ok - I get it. But if you’re kind of in-between and would like to help me out without a lasting commitment, you can leave a tip below. Whatever you decide, I’m just glad you’re still here. And a really easy way to help me out without and money being involved is to share my newsletter with your family friends and colleagues - the more the better!
One more thing: Are morning people better at Wordle?
Sure is looking that way.
The Morningness-Eveningness Questionnaire ranks chronotype on a continuum. Morning types get high scores. Evening types score lower.
Previous research that didn't account for age found that evening types ("night owls") with lower MEQ scores tend to have better verbal abilities. However, a new study found that in later adulthood, morning types who habitually get up early have better verbal skills than age-matched peers.
In response to previous research showing that people with an eveningness orientation (night owls) tend to have superior verbal intelligence in comparison to their early-to-bed-early-to-rise counterparts, Fogel said in a November 2022 news release, "Once you account for key factors including bedtime and age, we found the opposite to be true, morning types tend to have superior verbal ability."
Here’s why:
The authors note that as people get older, morning chronotypes tend to develop a consistent daily routine that leads to higher "inter-daily stability" and strengthens circadian synchronization. They speculate that the combination of inter-daily stability and strong circadian synchronization boosts verbal skills, which gives early bird adults an advantage over age-matched night owls.
It’s all about circadian synchronisation. Lesson: Pay attention to what the sun is doing if you want to get better at wordle. A more comprehensive and infinitely better summary here.